Originally published on https://www.sarahcoudert.info/posts/the-night-i-thought-i-could-do-telekinesis
More real than real
In the heart of my childhood, when I was around 12 years old, nearly 15 years ago, I encountered an extraordinarily vivid dream. Occasionally, I experienced lucid dreams, but this particular one was distinct. It involved the sensation of telekinesis, an ability to maneuver objects solely with my thoughts.
The dream was so engrossing that it felt as if I were in my room, freely moving books and manipulating small objects with remarkable ease. The realism was profound, as though I had always possessed this ability, as innate as moving an arm or breathing without conscious effort.
With the break of dawn, my alarm clock shattered the dream. I was left questioning the fine line between dream and reality. Everything felt so vivid, almost tangible, as if I had truly mastered telekinesis. It was as if I had been stripped of a limb, robbed of a fundamental sense. The feeling was akin to losing something intrinsic.
In the face of such an intense experience, I struggled to reconcile my heightened sense of loss with the rational conclusion that it had been merely a dream. My body, mind, and memories seemed at odds with my reason and skepticism, though the latter was not as honed as it is today. The frustration and relentless persistence of that feeling led me to privately attempt to replicate the dream, to shift objects with my thoughts, even at the risk of seeming absurd.
Even now, 15 years later, the memory of that day is vivid, accompanied by a lingering sense of a "lost power." I often wonder how different things might have been if my skepticism was less defined or if I had been more prone to belief in the supernatural. Could I have been drawn to groups that believed in and practiced such abilities? Would I have tried to convince others, or even myself, of my "powers", potentially going to the extent of unconsciously simulating these abilities?
What could have been
Reflecting back, I'm grateful for the path I took, while the lingering questions offer a glimpse of alternate realities. This uncanny experience taught me the challenging nature of self-analysis and rational thinking. It reminded me of the complexity of the human mind and how it can weave elaborate narratives that blur the lines of reality. It also underscored our susceptibility to self-bias, the unconscious lens that can distort our perception and understanding of the world around us.
Our brains, while exceptional, are not infallible. They are capable of creating narratives, of constructing realities that may veer away from the objective truth. It's critical to remain mindful of this, to exercise vigilance and scrutinize our internal perceptions. This heightened awareness can safeguard us from straying into the realm of the implausible and help us keep our interpretation of reality grounded. We must always remain humble in the face of our fallibility, acknowledging our brain's potential to mislead us as much as it enlightens.